By Charlotte Webb, Defence Family Advocate of Australia

National Families Week  (12-15 May 2025) is a time to pause—not just to reflect, but to feel.  

To acknowledge the quiet strength, the unspoken sacrifices, and the invisible threads that bind Defence families across Australia.  

This year’s theme, “Lending a hand to thrive: supporting each other,” doesn’t just resonate—it pulses with truth for those of us who are living the rhythms of Defence life. 

As a former Defence spouse and mother of three beautiful girls, this life has shaped every part of who we are.  

For more than ten years, we lived in the shadow of absence. There were missed birthdays, school concerts, and dinner table conversations.  

And while we learned to adapt—to be brave, to be flexible, to smile through video calls—the weight of that absence never truly lifted. 

My daughters are now older, and they carry themselves with grace and strength that takes my breath away.  

But even now, I see the echoes of those years. I see it in their questions, in their resilience, in their longing for stability and presence.  

Defence children walk a path many others don’t understand. They grow up balancing pride with pain, love with longing. And they do it with extraordinary courage. 

This is why the idea of “lending a hand to thrive” is so powerful. Thriving doesn’t happen in a vacuum.  

It happens in community. It happens when families are seen, heard, and supported—not just with words, but with real action and care. 

Taking a fresh look at what is important 

Over the past year, Defence Families of Australia (DFA) has undergone a significant process of realignment.  

This has been a time of reflection and redefinition, focused on strengthening our internal structure, improving how we operate, and reaffirming our commitment to improving our transparency and being effective advocates for Defence families. 

And we haven’t done this alone.  

We’ve asked questions and invited your feedback. We’ve listened—really listened—to your stories. Stories of strength and of frustration, of loneliness, of trying to find your footing in a complex system, for a career and lifestyle that is not necessarily of your own choosing. 

Your voices have shaped our mission. And they’ve led us to three core priorities that now guide every part of our work: 

1. Family Readiness 

Because no family should have to face deployment, exercises, posting, or relocation without the tools to navigate it confidently. We’re advocating for systems that truly prepare and support you—not just in crisis, but every single step of the way. 

2. Contemporary Families 

Because our families are not all the same. We are single parents, same-sex couples, dual-serving families, blended families, families with kinship ties, long-distance carers and serving members with grown children. We want to ensure that every type of family is represented, respected, and supported in policy and practice. 

3. Family Wellbeing 

Because your wellbeing matters.  Support services for mental health, employment, social connection, and education are not side issues—they are foundational. We’re working hard to make sure families have access to what they need to thrive, not just survive. 

Taking action 

The work we’re doing isn’t happening from the sidelines.  

Through newly established initiatives like the Defence Families Stakeholder Roundtable with Defence Housing Australia (DHA), we’re bringing your experiences directly to DHA, Defence, and other key stakeholders.  

We’re not just identifying problems—we’re co-creating solutions. Because that’s how we operate, to influence solutions and make sure that we have the ability to be hands-on with tangible outcomes. 

We’re planning to improve how we communicate with you moving forward. We want you to see what we’re doing, to understand how your voices are shaping change, and to trust that we are working every day to make things better. 

For me, this work is personal.  

I’ve stood at the edge of the driveway, comforting children  and reassuring them that Daddy would be home “soon,” even when I didn’t know when that would be. I’ve watched my girls find their own strength, leaning on each other and growing into remarkable young women forged by the fire of Defence life. 

This National Families Week, I want to say this from the heart: you are not alone.  

Whether you’re a partner holding the fort, a serving parent juggling careers and home life, or a child learning to be brave in your own way—your story matters. Your voice is powerful. And together, we are building something better. 

So, let’s keep showing up for one another. Let’s keep lending a hand—through kindness, through advocacy, through courage.  

When we support each other; we don’t just survive. We rise. We grow. We thrive. 

To every family in our Defence community: thank you.  You are the heart of this community. And you are never, ever alone.